Clickables. because I'm a clicker.

Let's jump right in...


Monkey's Eating Jello
Part of an enrichment program at the Bronx Zoo. To help keep the monkey brains on their toes. or something.


____



What 2009's Movies Have Taught Us
personal favorites:
District Nine - A spaceship that has run out of power can still levitate itself, despite a lack of power
The Hangover - If you have to feed a tiger in the bathroom, go inside and close the door, instead of just entering, throwing him the steak and run closing the door after you.


____



Sinks. Yeah, Sinks.

Idk about you, but I'm a sucker for some badass interior design. This page has a few of the coolest sinks I've ever fucking seen.
seriously.
sinks.
hit that bowl and check 'em out.


____


If sinks aren't your think, maybe you'd like to see people who've clearly had too much to drink.This guy here certainly looks like he's had one too many. Or maybe he's just using his sex appeal to score him a few more free drinks. If that's the case, play on playa. See his fellow overconsumers here.

DRUNKFACE.

Today's Dose

Nothing says it's a new year like reorganization.
give it a try, with one of these strange calendars.
The Weirdest Calendars of 2010


____

[TFLN]
reppin' the 803

(803): What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.

(803): I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15

(803): it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.

(803): Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.

there's going to be a book too, so keep your eyes peeled.

____


I've been wanting my parents to see this one particular episode of the Boondocks for a while. It's called Return of the King, and it's fucking awesome.

When Martin Luther King comes out of a coma after 32 years and finds himself thrust into the 21st century and life in the post-September 11 era, his "turn the other cheek" philosophy quickly takes him from beloved national hero to despised terrorist sympathizer.

-- [adultswim]

It was orginally aired a few years ago, and amid much controversy. Cartoon Netword defended it's cartoonist, issuing a statement:

"We think Aaron McGruder came up with a thought-provoking way of not only showing Dr. King's bravery but also of reminding us of what he stood and fought for, and why even today, it is important for all of us to remember that and to continue to take action."

The episode eventually won the Peabody Award. It's worth a peak. The full free version can be found by following the link.

____

I'm pretty excited for this new game, Bayonetta. I keep seeing commercials for it. Wikipedia says it's:

an action game for the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360, directed by Devil May Cry and Viewtiful Joe video game series creator Hideki Kamiya at Platinum Games in cooperation with publisher Sega. Set in a fictional city in Europe, the game centers on its title character Bayonetta, who uses pistols and magical attacks to defeat enemies. The game has five difficulty settings; its two easiest settings contain a game mode playable with only one button, similar to a mode used in Devil May Cry. Its developers designed its characters with modern style and fashion in mind, and composed for it a largely upbeat and feminine soundtrack.

Bayonetta is a single-player, third-person 3D action game. Its combat system is similar to that of director Hideki Kamiya's previous title, Devil May Cry.[3] The player controls a witch named Bayonetta, and using both melee and long ranged attacks, complex combo strings, and multiple weapons, is encouraged to explore ways to dispatch angelic enemies with as much flair as possible. Special commands or actions are woven into events, finishes, executions, and unique "Torture combos" in which Bayonetta summons a variety of devices to deal devastating blows to her enemies. Such devices range from guillotines to iron maidens. Bayonetta also has unique but limited abilities that her enemies do not possess, such as "Witch Time", which activates when the player makes a well-timed dodge to an attack. This temporarily slows time to allow Bayonetta to inflict massive amounts of counter damage before the enemies can react.

The player can double jump for extra height, perform evasive backflips, and destroy background objects and doors. Camera views can be rotated, enemy targets can be locked on, and weapons can be switched during play. With unlockable transformations, the player can make Bayonetta become a panther or one of various other living creatures to enhance her abilities. Lollipops can be used to heal her. Many enemies and objects drop halos, which resemble the rings from Sega's Sonic the Hedgehog games, when destroyed; the player can collect the halos to buy upgrades and weapons.The player can also use enemy weapons, either to directly attack or as props for movement. Bayonetta's strongest attacks transform her hair into giant boots, fists or monsters that assault the enemy.

The song that plays in the ad is what gets me though. It's called "In for the Kill" by the group La Roux who I'm a really big fan of at the moment. There's a remixed version that Skream did of the song which I really like, which you can check out if you like. Though, if you're going to look into La Roux, you should listen to I'm not Your Toy and/or Bulletproof.

Speaking of La Roux, check out this picture of Elly.



I saw this and the first thing I thought was "holy shit, i've seen that face makeup before." My friend Drew has this really sweet Dead Weather poster, and it took me forever to find the picture, but I finally did, so you too might make comparison.



____



Cityrag has provided us with a collection of what they're calling the Weed of the Year, as well as a collection of badass homemade bongs.


viva la kush.

My Life Websites

lastly, I want to address these 'my life' websites somehow.
so here they are.
links to strange places.

not sure how being weird makes you average.
(though after consideration, maybe that makes most sense.)

fml.
'nuff said.

MLIG
because ganstas need a community too.

MLIC
for those who find the f word vulgar.

lmylife
...because my life IS fucking awesome.


AND, saving the saddest for last:
MLIT
because shitty vampire novels get shitter fan sites.

for your consideration. aka [today]

god its nice to have a decent girl friend again.
that's all I'm going to say on that matter.


I've been cracked out on Call of Duty 2 for the past few days. It's seriously getting bad.
before beginning the links, here are some honorable mentions:

Today on the radio I heard that Kanye, the man who wants to be the called the next "King of Pop" (dream on douche bag), was at the top of the list being counted down on 100.1 The Beat. What list was this you may ask? The Top 10 Drama Queens of 2009. Thats right. The wannabe King was named #1 Queen. Oh the irony.


ladies if you have some time to kill: polyvore


anyway, here are some things I've run across worth mentioning, for you :)



Dogs in Clothes




















Best Revenge EVER.
(okay, maybe not ever, but definitely fucking hilarious)



WEAR A CONDOM
literally.

Reading List Resolutions

Here's to hoping this is a realistic goal. Most likely not, but if I set goals I can't reach perhaps I'll make it further than if I set those I know I can attain.

So, here is the book breakdown for 2010.

As I am a chronic not-finisher of books, lets begin there.

Books I need to finish reading:

Shattering: Food, Politics, and the Loss of Genetic Diversity [Cary Fowler & Pat Mooney]
Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers [Mary Roach]
The Picture of Dorian Gray [Oscar Wilde]
The Once and Future King [T.H. White]
Les Miserables [Victor Hugo]
A History of God [Karen Armstrong]
The Historian [Elizabeth Kostova]
The Stuff of Thought: Language as a window into the human mind [Steven Pinker]
The Alphabet vs. the Goddess [Leonard Shlain]
Atlas Shrugged [Ayn Rand]
Pnin [Vladimir Nabokov]


next up we have...
Books I need to begin (and then finish):
White Noise [Don Delillo]
The Count of Monte Cristo [Alexander Dumas]
A Confederacy of Dunces [John Kennedy Toole]
Seascape [Edward Albee]
The Moon is a Harsh Mistress [Robert Heinlein]
Foundation [Isaac Assimov]
Mythology [Edith Hamilton]
More Sex is Safer Sex: The Unconventional Wisdom of Economics [Steven E. Landsburg]
A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a boy soldier [Ishmael Beah]
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius [Dave Eggers]
Middlesex [Jeffrey Eugenides]
Watershed [Percival Everett]
The Essential Dali Lama: His Important Teachings [edited by: Rajiv Mehrotra]
Breakfast of Champions [Kurt Vonnegut]

As several of these are poets, and several I'm just unsure as of yet what I intend to delve into, here are authors I'd like to read more from:

Steven King
Ezra Pound
T.S. Eliot
Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Edith Wharton
Charles Bukowski
H.G. Wells
Cormac McCarthy
Henry David Thoreau
Chuck Palahnuik


Books I reccommend for this year if you need something to read:
What is the What? [Dave Eggers]
The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao [Junot Diaz]
Dune [Frank Hubert]
The Great Gatsby [F. Scott Fitzgerald]
The Sun Also Rises {Ernest Hemmingway]
Their Eyes Were Watching God [Zorah Neal Hurston]
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas [Hunter S. Thompson]
The Crimson Petal and the White [Michael Faber]
Grapes of Wrath [John Steinbeck]
The Time Machine [H.G. Wells]
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking Glass [Lewis Carroll]


if you have questions/comments/concerns/reviews, bring 'em on.

before I sleep for the first time in 2010...

I would first like to address a few things.
1. we had oh eight, oh nine, what is this? twentyten? is that what we call this? what will be the hipster name we dub the year? time will tell.
2. resolutions: I want to read more books. I hope to within the week have a reading list of the books I would like to tackle. I think that's doable, and at least something I'll adhere to. Oh, and a GX pass with some friends.
3. I turn 21 in ten days. Good times lay ahead.
4. Happy New Year!

Reason #43327 to love music

Silver, by Bonobo